As my Reading Notes reveal I am currently reading a stack of fabulous books, some back in print only this year, the greatest of them never widely read if read at all — Chodorov, Nock, Oppenheirmer, DeLorenzo, Vowell — all agreeing to the hilt with Illich and me that coercion doesn’t make for a good humanity. None of those authors seem to be aware of Illich or me, but that’s par for the kleptocratic course: man will die, unsustainable, terminally deluded, and never know what hit him, never know he ever had a choice.
Funny thing is: something one of the first three mentioned, Chodorov probably, comparing Marx to Plato in his insane faith in the state, got me thinking of early reading of mine in Plato, back in high school.
My mother was reading The Republic, then she read Symposium, then she read Symposium with me, then, a year or so later, in college, I read The Republic, or tried to: and failed. I’ve always failed. (I loved the Symposium: all these old faggots drinking themselves into ever-funnier stories.) And now I believe I know why I failed to like The Republic: Plato, with his Socratic double-talk, attributes to philosophers the potential for wisely governing society. My basic bias, apparently from infancy, maybe from St. Paul, is to mistrust society, to mistrust man, to mistrust civilization … to mistrust philosophy: and intellect, and perception …
(Now I mistrust God too!)
(He takes me into heaven, gives me a breather, repays my suffering, in advance, but then he puts me right back here again!)
(Early Christians saw perfectly clearly that God abandoned Jesus on the cross!)
(What do I trust? (Why should I have to trust anything?) I trust the truth: nature, evolution: to weed out false sentience. (Like St. Paul!))
(Bullying is set up for a big bruise, so stupid it can’t imagine.)
Bullying is set up for the biggest bruise of all.